The purpose of this article is to stimulate your thinking about what really influences human behavior and, if it's not working, to get you to think beyond your current approach to building long-term business relationships.

There are three ways to influence human behavior.  The most common and least powerful way is by addressing needs.  More, but not the most, powerful are wants. And, by far, the most effective way to influence human behavior is through core values.  Values-Based Selling is the key to deliberately getting people emotionally involved and creating trust.  Don't confuse “values-based” selling with “value-added” marketing.

I am not suggesting that you ignore needs; however, we no longer live in a needs-oriented society.  Why are needs the least powerful way to influence human behavior?  Needs are tied to “shoulds”.  For instance, take statements like “I should save money”; “I should make more investments”; “I should make better decisions”; "I should get a financial plan"; or “I should have more discipline”.  The key to guiding people toward smart choices is to get them to want to.

Tangible wants are a step in the right direction.  Tangible wants, such as early retirement, vacation homes, good schools for the kids, new car, estate protection, travel, and other goals are incentives to seek advice.

But, in truth, even wants don't have the emotional pull that values do.   Values are intangible feelings.  Intangible, pure, undiluted feelings like love, pride, security, freedom, making a difference,  independence, accomplishment, self worth, and so forth are key factors in influencing behavior.  Values illuminate people's emotional motives so clearly, they must take action ... for their own reasons.  Needs have the power to illuminate emotional motives as much as the penlight on your key ring, while wants work like your average flashlight.

Values, however, illuminate emotional motives like a row of halogen high-beams on the front of a Mercedes on the Autobahn.  Your prospects and clients are most likely to take action on your ideas when they feel a strong emotional connection to them.  Your job is to illuminate their emotions so they fully understand the relationship between smart decisions and fulfilling their life values.  Your job isn’t to be a traditional sales person and sell the “old school” way.

Everyone has a unique “values hierarchy”.  Just like fingerprints, no two values hierarchies are alike.  When you stimulate a conversation with current and prospective clients about their values (what is truly important to them), they will become emotionally involved, you can touch on their ranking of values, understand them at a deeper level, and you can dramatically shorten the time it takes to gain their trust.  Emotional involvement and trust are two critical elements in creating profitable client relationships.

Without realizing it, you project your own values when you promote yourself.   How do you feel when people project their values on you?  Do you like it?   Are you anxious to do business with people who project their values on you?  You can't get people emotionally motivated when discussing your values.  You do it by talking about their values.  The first logical question to ask yourself is, “How do I get people to talk about what is important to them (their values)?”

Then, ask yourself, “How do I use that information in a positive way?   How does this create trust?”  Listen for words and phrases like freedom, control, satisfaction, making a difference, independence, feel really good, pride, achievement, contribution, oneness with God, etc.  These are indicators that you are on the right track, because they represent values.  And values are emotional and they create positive emotional feelings in the person you are speaking with.  The thing to remember is that when needs-oriented planning leaves your client flat, try focusing on your clients values instead.  Needs simply don't have the emotional punch to influence human behavior. 

Remember, the least effective approach is to try to satisfy client needs.   A better approach is to help clients get what they want and desire.  The most effective sales professionals help clients fulfill their values in life.   Differentiate yourself!  Don’t be a traditional salesperson, become a Trusted Sales Professional.