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"If at first you don't succeed, try, try, again." Mom and Dad were wrong about this one. Now I know that their motives were good, and the principle, in and of itself had value. They were teaching us to ease into what ever it was that we were struggling with. I know the lesson they were teaching us was pure and sound but when we get to be adults we should get away from the 'try' and get into the 'do.' There is one very important thing lacking behind the 'try' word. Commitment, anytime you use the word 'try' it lacks commitment. Here is an example most of us see at least once a week. How many times during the course of the week do you have someone come up to you and say, "Hey, I'm going to 'try' and get in touch with you sometime next week." Whenever I hear that I always reply, "What do you mean, try?" Does that mean if you're in the mood, or if you remember my number, or if you're by a phone and have 35 cents?" Do
you notice a difference between, "I'm going to 'try' to get in touch with
you next week" and "Tuesday at 3:00 in the afternoon, I'm going to
call you at this number. Are you
going to be in?" Do you see
the difference? One
is committed the other is not. Some
people use the 'try' word just to get out from under the task at hand or to be
polite. Either way, it lacks
integrity. Here
is another example. How many of you
out there have 'tried' skydiving? You know jumping out of a plane with parachutes on. I had one guy in my seminar say, "Well, I have." I stated that he didn't 'try' he actually 'did' the skydiving thing. He countered with, "No, I tried it!" I asked him to explain. He proceeded to tell me how he went up in the plane and strapped the parachute on. When they came to the drop area and opened the door, he looked out and it appeared to be a lot higher than he thought it was going to be, so he asked them to close the door. I said, "You mean you did not jump out?" He said "No, but I tried skydiving." I countered by saying, "You didn't 'try' skydiving, you simply went on a plane ride with a parachute on!" To this day I don't know if he got the message, but the rest of the class did. Do
this, for the next week, stop using the 'try' word. If you catch yourself or another person use it, ask yourself
or them if that really was what you meant.
You see, I have more respect for someone who will say, "I'm not
going to do that" and then tell me why, than someone who will say,
"I'll try," and then not deliver.
On the first hand, I know where I stand. I've got to do it myself or get someone who will. It's not hard, simply replace the word 'try' with 'do' and see if you notice the difference. Here
is an important question. Do you
want to 'try' to be happy? Do you
want to 'try' to be a good Father or Mother?
Do you want to 'try' to do a good job at work?
It is more than a semantics issue; it ties directly into our level of
commitment. |
