Successful Networking is an Attitude

Being successful at networking requires more than just a smile and a great database. Successful networking is a state of mind — an attitude. Even though networking is often defined as cultivating clients, the attitude that will lead to success is one of giving, not getting.

The selfish networker. When this person enters a room full of people, he views everyone as a potential customer. His conversation is slanted to selling whatever it is he does. He has success, but limited success. He has to go through a lot of people to get any results.

The successful networker. This person enters a room, she sees people who need to be connected with other people. Her conversation is geared to finding out what people need and then determining if she knows someone else who can provide it. If that person turns out to be her, so much the better. But the key here is that she doesn’t go into the situation with that end in mind.

Once this attitude is adopted, there are three steps to make networking pay off. Process, Place, and Practice.

Process. Process refers to how and why you are going to go about networking. Determine the answers to the following questions:

        • Why am I networking?

        • Who will I be networking with?

        • What am I able to give?

        • What do I hope to gain?

        • When will I network?

With these answers in mind, set goals for your networking, decide on a tracking system, get your tools ready (business cards, brochures, contact lists for referrals).

Place. Open your mind to the endless possibilities. Anywhere there is another human being, there is the possibility of networking. Especially good locations are:

        • Chambers of Commerce

        • Professional Conferences

        • Social Clubs and Churches

        • Networking Groups

        • Professional Associations

        • Alumni Associations

        • Charitable Organizations

A few months ago, I was in the lobby of a hotel waiting for the airport shuttle. As I waited, I noticed a lady lift a beautiful necklace from her shopping bag and admire her purchase. I said, "My, what a pretty necklace." I was tired from the conference I had attended and wasn’t at all interested in networking. Even though I didn’t think I was networking, those five little words proved to be some of the best networking I’ve done.

As we were loading our luggage, she asked me, "And what do you do?" My spirits plummeted. I was tired from a long trip, I didn’t want to go into a sales mode, so I tried to be brief. "I’m a professional speaker." "Oh really?", she exclaimed. "I come to these conferences looking for speakers for my company." My inner voice sighed, "Why now? I’m so tired. I don’t want to do this!" We got into the car and as we glided off to the airport, she asked, "What do you speak about?" In a totally negative state of mind, I handed her my business card and mumbled that my speeches were listed on the back. She read down the list of talks and asked, "Right Person, Right Job — what’s that all about?" At that point I gave up and realized I was getting into the conversation whether I wanted to or not. I explained that many of my consulting clients had been burned in the firing/firing process, that I had found some objective assessments to use in the process, and that the speech taught a better way to hire employees. "Really!", she excitedly interrupted. "I have to hire someone next week and I can’t afford to make a mistake! Please overnight me the marketing materials for these assessments."

When I got back to the office, I sent her the materials. She liked them and purchased the software and the assessments. Next, she hired me to come out an spend two days with her department to work on team building. The day I returned from that engagement, I received a call from another group in the same company asking when I could come back and do the same for them!

Without even trying to network, as a matter of fact doing everything I could to avoid it, I sold some product, booked two engagements, made a friend, and added to my network.

Practice. Like anything else, proper networking is a process that can be learned but must be practiced to get it right. The most important aspect of networking is creating a good first impression. Since you only have one chance to do this, it makes sense to hone the skills that will accomplish it. Here are some guidelines:

• Keep business cards with you at all times, along with pen and          paper to jot notes on the cards you receive to help remember the         who when and where of why you have them

• Have a "TMAY" — "Tell Me About Yourself." This is a short phrase         that will enable you to respond professionally and in a way that          will attract interest and lead you into a meaningful conversation.

• Remember the 3 foot rule. Anyone within three feet (about the          length of a handshake) is a prospect and possible contact for you.

             •       Always smile at people — it’s contagious!

• Have fun! Take networking seriously, but don’t be serious when          you are doing it.

Networking is an attitude — both yours and the other person’s. Your job is to get others to see you as someone who wants to help them, not sell them. Once you accomplish this, everyone you add to your network will be actively selling you to everyone else they network with. In giving, you receive. Proper networking is the definitive "win-win" relationship.