My junior-high daughter, Amy, is typically quite expressive at the dinner table when asked, "What did you do at school today?"
"My day was great!", she responds. "We studied our math facts and we learned all about different types of insects and we..."
On the other hand, my high-schooler son, Eric, will say, "Nothin. The usual."
For a while, it was enough to send me screaming like a maniac out the front door, frustrated with his vague answers and peeved he wouldn’t share more details. But I finally recognized the real problem, which is painfully obvious because I’m so close to it every day--during the day, that is. Most answers we get are directly attributable to the quality of the questions, and it’s exactly the same in sales. It’s not that I should be frustrated with my son’s answers; instead I should celebrate my good fortune with my daughter’s detailed responses to admittedly vague questions, and realize that Eric isn’t any different than most kids... or adults for that matter. People would rather not kick their brain into overdrive to answer questions.
Therefore, when we’re the ones seeking information, we should put the burden of the deep cerebral thought on ourselves when we formulate the questions, instead of on our listeners when they’re answering them.
In a "USA Today" article by Nanci Hellmich, there were numerous relevant points we can take to heart--both as parents and salespeople--in order to get better responses to questions the article was titled "Gentle Art of Conversing With Kids." (I’ll adapt the ideas to sales.)
1. To get people to open up, you need to catch them at the right time. And that time for kids is not normally right after school. Like you and me, they need to unwind. And for prospects, a good time to ask questions is after they see a reason to answer... after you’ve phrased a brilliant opening that makes them interested and curious.
2. Avoid the general questions. To get better answers, ask about things they’re interested in (for both groups). Instead of, "What are your needs?", ask, "What objectives will you work on this year regarding the promotion of the new system?"
Don't ask, "What do you look for in a vendor?" That forces them to do too much comparing in their mind. Give them something visually and emotionally-specific to react to:
"What quality measurement do you require, and how does it affect your end product when you don't get it?"
3. Follow up on what they’ve told you before. If your child told you last night during dinner he had a substitute teacher that day, ask if the stand-in made it through day-two today, or if she needed a pinch hitter herself. Before calls check your notes from your previous phone conversations, and ask your customer about something she had told you earlier:
"What finally happened with the additional money you were hoping to have allocated?"
4. Read feelings. Instead of saying, "How was (or is) your day (going)?", give them more material to work with:
"You sure seem in a great mood today! Tell me about it."
5. Share of yourself. Give a little to prime the pump.
"I’m noticing that the weather in the East has affected some of my customers' ability to ship product. Has that been a factor with you?"
6. Pay attention! I’m embarrassed to admit there have been times where my mind was a thousand miles away--but I nodded and smiled in mock attention anyway--when one of my kids was chattering incessantly (voluntarily) about some character in a book. Likewise, we’ve all done the same on the phone.
Very dangerous, in both cases. His desire to speak diminishes in proportion to his perception of your lack of desire to listen. Give plenty of feedback, and keep them talking.
It's simple: ask better questions, and get better answers.
