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Consider the Purpose Before
you jump into a conversation, consider the outcome you hope to gain from
it. Too many times, we just start talking without specific goals for the
conversation. At the end of the conversation we walk off frustrated
because we haven't received what we wanted from the encounter. To reduce
frustration - on the part of both participants - plan what outcome you
want before speaking. Then set up the outcome by announcing at the
beginning of the conversation what you hope to accomplish. You'll be
able to cut down on the amount of wasted time and gain respect from your
conversant for respecting their time as well. You'll obtain your desired
results with a greater degree of frequency, too. Consider the Place In
addition to thinking about your intent in talking with someone, also
consider the place. Just because you both end up in a particular
location at a point in time does not mean that that's the opportune time
to have a particular conversation. Business conversations should take
place at the business or at networking events specifically designed for
such chats. Social
occasions should be just that - a chance to relax and be social, to get
to know folks better - not to finish conducting business left over from
the office. Successful communication is more probable when both parties
are focused on the business at hand, not distracted by events going on
around them or the need to pay attention to some other activity. Consider the Person Think
about the person with whom you'll be having the conversation. What is
their communication style? Do they need to have discussion points in
writing in advance to be able to be prepared? Do they need lots of
detail? Are they the type of person who needs to schmooze before getting
down to facts or are they the "cut to the chase" type who gets
irritated at idle chatter? Do they need time to process information
before making a decision or do they spontaneously okay something that
sounds new and interesting? By thinking about that person's
communication style, you can tailor your communication behavior to meet
their needs, thereby insuring a more successful outcome. Consider Your Personality What
kind of person are you? Are you the fast talking, lots of gestures,
likes to hear themselves talk kind of person? Are you a totally goal
oriented, down to business kind of person? Do you like lots of details
and organization and time to process information? Do you just want to
get along with everyone, do a good job, and go home? Depending on who
you are and your assessment of the person you are going to talk with,
you may need to modify your behavior if you want to have the
conversation end successfully. For
example, if you're the "spontaneous, this sounds like fun, let's do
it" type and you need to talk to the "lots of details, time to
process information" type, you'll need to take the time to get
organized, plan what you're going to say and then slow down your speech
and gestures. If you don't modify your behavior to match that of the
other person, you run the risk of turning them off on your ideas because
they're turned off by your style. Better to mirror them to get your
ideas across and to get to know them better, and then relax into what's
natural behavior for you. Clear
communication always starts with the end in view. Know your purpose, set
the stage correctly for the time and place of the conversation, consider
the other person's communication style needs, and know yourself.
Thinking through these four keys will help insure that your
conversations are meaningful, relevant, and accomplish your goals. |
